VIRTUAL SEASON 7.5

episode 30

Purple Prose from Cellblock 74

 

 

by Christina and the VS 7.5 writing staff


EXTRA!


Nunk stood patiently in the mail call line, knowing that to do anything else would invite snide comments -- and he was tired of the cracks the other prisoners continuously made about his lobes. He suspected that was why his brother was always indisposed at mail call.

"Nunk or Blont, you have mail."

Nunk stepped forward and took the package. The Klingon guard snarled something at another prisoner. "From your mother," he said. "Now why would she be sending you such dishonorable material? The warden has okayed it."

Nunk wondered why Blont wanted to read about Voyager. Nunk preferred to forget about that ship -- but Blont continued to scheme.

Blont was in their cell when he arrived. "It's been three months and I asked Moogie to send this to us every month." He snatched the PADD. "Well, well...*Now* she sends us the Anniversary Issue."

"Blont, why do this to us. The hoo-mans have a saying about putting chemicals in open wounds..."

Blont glared at him, and Nunk sat down on his bunk without another word.

Blont grinned. "I was correct, Starfleet has no intention of sharing Voyager's technology with anyone. But, little brother, it's not all in vain." Blont's wicked grin grew. "I have a plan..."

Nunk shivered. Perhaps he should ask the warden for another cell. "Yes, Brother."

"But, right now, Voyager. Get over here and read this to me. This could be very interesting."

Nunk obediently stood and moved closer to take the PADD. "The Risian Ribald? Wouldn't the Federation Daily tell us more?" He didn't duck fast enough. Blont's fist landed on his right lobe. Nunk didn't dare rub it, fearful Blont would strike again. He wished he'd remained a courier for their uncle. At least that job wouldn't have landed him in jail -- or at least it was less likely it would have.

He started to read.

 

 

"I knew there had to be another reason for our illegal imprisonment in the middle of nowhere. We knew the truth," Blont said with a satisfactory smile.

"Proxima prison isn't exactly in the middle..." Nunk didn't finish his sentence. Blont was considered by the family to have excellent lobes for business, and Nunk wasn't about to contradict his family -- at least out loud.

"Read the next one," Blont said as he leaned back on his bunk and crossed his arms.

"I have work detail in ten minutes," Nunk said. Blont frowned. Nunk didn't dare say anything else. Blont had not approved of Nunk volunteering -- it was not good business, the pay wasn't enough. Nunk had his eye on early parole, not that he'd told Blont that. He saw it as a chance to gain his independence from his brother.

"Read on," Blont snarled.

Nunk obediently went to the next article, and grinned. "Ooooo. Look at those fingers." Blont grabbed the PADD

"Look at the ridges. I do like my women to have ridges. She's only half Klingon. Do you think she's anything like full-blooded Klingon females?" Blont tossed the PADD back to Nunk. "I've heard about this triangle. Vulcans...Bah."

 

 

"Contagious? Pon Farr is contagious?" Blont said. Nunk stifled a groan. He could just imagine the direction his brother's mind was heading.

"We can't. We're in here."

"Maybe not," Blont said with a smile. "I have friends. The ultimate aphrodisiac. Everyone will want to buy. We'll be rich..."

Nunk rolled his eyes. "Let me read the next one." He hoped that this might distract his brother from anymore scheming. A quick glance told him it would only worsen the matter. He read this one to himself. He then scanned the rest of the PADD hoping their mom had sent him other such ads. Blont didn't notice the extended silence.

 

 

Nunk moved quickly to the next article. This one sounded particularly unpleasant, in a pleasant sort of way.

 

 

"That's creepy. Females..." Blont grinned lasciviously. "I bet they do great oo-mox though."

"I don't like how they do it," Nunk retorted.

"Whatever. Are there any Vulcans here?"

"Vulcans don't get thrown in jail," Nunk replied.

"Maybe someone on the staff. Find out," Blont ordered. "Continue reading."

 

 

"Most curious," Nunk said when he finished. "That Ensign Gilmore had such lovely fingers."

Blont shook his head. "Brother, you need to think about how we're going to turn a profit in here."

"I'd rather think about the luscious B'Elanna...or that Borg, Seven. Yum, her attributes...

"Nunk! Read."

 

 

Nunk reread that article to himself. Blont had closed his eyes and was deep in thought. Nunk hated that look. He started to read the next article. "Hey, it's about us!"

Blont stood quickly. "Give me that." Nunk relinquished the PADD. Someone knew their story. Maybe, Moogie could get them out of here.

 

 

"Well?" Nunk asked when his brother finished. "What happens next?"

There were several seconds of silence, then Blont grunted. "Females! Moogie didn't send the continuation. I hadn't heard anyone wanted to interview us. I'll have to speak to the warden." He handed the PADD back to Nunk. "You need to go clean latrines, or whatever you do. I'm going to think for a while."

Nunk placed the PADD on the table. He signaled the guard to let him out. As the heavy door opened, Blont said, very quietly. "And don't forget about the Vulcans."

#

Nunk sat down, pleased that his two hour laundry detail was finished. Well, not pleased. It meant he had to return to his cell...And Blont. Maybe he could volunteer somewhere else. As he stood, his foot kicked something. He looked down, surprised to see a PADD. He'd take it to the guard. Perhaps the owner was looking for it. He turned it on, to see if the owner's name was there.

"The Terran Inquirer." He continued to read, then sighed as he started reading the third article. "She had such lovely fingers...And those nanoprobes."

 

 

Nunk quickly looked through the index, hoping that perhaps the story about New Eden would be there. He heard the door open and quickly turned the PADD off. A frustrated looking human entered.

"Did you find a PADD?" the human asked.

Nunk handed it to him. "Is this it? I found it on the floor."

"Thank you." The human jogged out of the room before Nunk thought of asking for a reward.

"Oh well," Nunk sighed. He just wouldn't tell his brother.

#

 

 

Blont leaned back and closed his eyes. Nunk hoped he was finally falling asleep. Nunk let his thoughts turn to leather.

"Nunk! We have plans to make. You can sleep later."

Nunk opened his eyes with a sigh. "I wasn't sleeping. Really. But, think of the bewitching B'Elanna in leather. Or for that matter, the seductive Seven, the delightful Delaney's..."

Blont grimaced. "I told you to stay away from Pov. If he was so good getting females, what is he doing in here?"

"An honest accounting mistake," Nunk retorted. "He says females like poetry."

"On your time...which belongs to me, so no more poetry. Did you find us a Vulcan?"

Nunk sighed again. He'd really hoped Blont had forgotten about this Pon Farr stuff. It would be a long night.

#

Nunk yawned three times as he sat down at the empty table. He liked eating in the back, where no one would bother him. Blont had sat at the first table. Nunk dreaded to think about what schemes his brother was concocting. He glance at the PADD.

 

 

Nunk finished his gruel without a single slurp. Perhaps he should write this Astral Andy.

Dear Astral Andy, he thought.

My brother is considered by the family to have the *lobes for business*, while I do not. His schemes keep getting us in trouble...

Nah, he decided. He wouldn't write.

"Perhaps you should," a voice said. He looked up. He didn't recognize the Betazed female who spoke to him. "Why do you let him boss you around?"

"He's my brother. I don't have the lobes for business." She had lucious fingers. "Who are you?"

"Relena," she said. "You must be Nunk. The warden said you were the sensible one. I'm the new counselor."

Nunk stared at her, the fingers forgotten. Sensible? He wasn't sure if he should be insulted or not.

"Take my advice, don't let your brother get you involved with any of his schemes." She took the PADD and shook her head. "The Risian Ribald." She handed it back. "I suggest you find something else to occupy your time. Perhaps you should schedule an appointment."

"Oo-mox?" he whispered after she left. What an opportunity. To spend time with her alone in her office. He jumped when someone slapped him.

"Ouch."

"Next time brother, don't start daydreaming. Noren has some friends who might be willing to help us."

"Yes, brother." Nunk decided -- no, he admitted, he'd decided soon after Blont had fixated on the Pon Farr virus idea -- it was time to leave his brother.

"Have you found anything else in that PADD to help our enterprise?"

"No, brother," As Nunk answered, he placed the PADD in front of Blont. He managed to keep a straight face. He even knew what Blont's reaction to the open advertisement would be.

 

 

Nunk was not disappointed. Blont had left quickly to discuss with his future sponsors how they could use this to help fund their research. Nunk picked up the PADD and walked over to the guard. "I'd like to make an appointment with the Warden."

#

Family loyalty only went so far, but Nunk hadn't told the Warden about Blont's newest scheme. He had made his request and now just had to wait to see if his transfer came through. He glanced at his brother lying in his bunk. Maybe Blont had finally fallen asleep.

"You can't even read correctly," Blont snarled. "Keep going."

 

 

"All that lovely alien technology," Blont murmured. "We would have been rich."

Nunk stood and turned the lights out.

"We're not done!"

"Yes we are. That was the last article." Nunk smiled. "Even Ferengi with brilliance and lobes like yours need their sleep." Blont chortled at the compliment (which Nunk didn't mean).

 

Nunk was glad that he didn't have to explain to his brother why he was grinning. Blont had gone to a meeting of the executive board of his new corporation. Nunk had politely declined. The silence to enjoy his good news was wonderful. He picked up the PADD that had haunted him for a week to reread one section. The most important section...He just didn't know which one actually applied to him. He'd tried to find how Ferengi months corresponded to Risian months.

Not that it really mattered.

 

 

Nunk jumped at the sound of the slamming door. "So, I hear you are being transferred. Don't worry," Blont said. "I have connections."

Nunk didn't respond. Blont wouldn't...would he?

"Ummm, that's okay. I don't want to cause any trouble."

"Nonsense. I need you here. We start selling Ponfaria next month. Think of the latinum we'll be making. I can buy my way out of this place." Blont growled. "The Federation had no right to jail businessmen."

"Ponfaria?" Nunk had missed this one.

"If you'd come tonight, you'd know that Ponfaria is going to make us rich."

"Pon Farr. I get it. But won't the Vulcans complain?"

Blont laughed. "They won't get involved. At worst one might say 'no comment.' It's perfect. And there is so little information about Pon Farr out there that we can't get in trouble."

Nunk glanced at the PADD. Two of the horoscopes leapt out. "An unfortunate business investment may leave you frustrated. Perhaps it's because your, naiveté while often charming, allowed you to be duped into another Ferengi land deal."

That's how he'd been forced to work with Blont -- after Blont had lost everything years ago in a land deal.

"A close relative will again cause you grief. Whoever it is, your tendency to retreat may be to your peril. Rein in your shyness and stand up for yourself."

Nunk took a deep breath. "Blont, I asked for the transfer. It was approved today. I want to go."

Blont stared at him, the stunned look pleased Nunk. He'd finally been able to surprise his brother. "You what?"

"I want to go. Not one of your plans has worked. I'm tired of it. The Warden says I'll be eligible for parole in a year. I don't want you to ruin it for me."

"Me ruin it for you?" Blont continued to stare at him. "Be that way. But when the latinum starts rolling in, don't ask me for any. Business before family loyalties."

"I agree." Nunk tossed the PADD onto Blont's bed. "You might want to read the Sign of the Dripping Dewmelon. It's been the story of all your schemes."

Blont picked up the PADD. "How low can you stoop? Risian horoscopes? Such nonsense. 'The Sign of the Profitmongols is on the rise'." Blont grinned. "The Ferengi Business Journal is in the library. I happened to see it. 'Well planned ventures are sure to succeed if started before the rise of the latinum star'. Our timing is perfect." He put the PADD down again.

Nunk shook his head. He should have done this years ago. "I leave in an hour. I've written Moogie." He didn't have much. A few clothes and the credits earned working in the laundry. He smiled. Laundry was a lucrative business. He was always finding things in the machines afterwards. He had packed those things carefully. Not that he was worried about being caught -- he was worried that Blont would find them.

"And my cut?"

Nunk turned around. "Your cut of what?"

"My finder's fee. For finding you a job you can handle."

Nunk frowned. Then pulled two credits out. "Here. And good-bye."

He was out of the cell before Blont shouted that two credits was not the agreed upon amount.

#

Several months later Nunk read that the Federation Food and Drug Department had raided a factory for making illegal and dangerous drugs. He smiled. Ponfaria had not been the aphrodisiac Blont had dreamed of. Klingons and Bajorans in particular had developed severe rashes after using Ponfaria.

***


Articles

Harmon Brando aka Janet

Jules Aveenez aka Julie

Nado Tathet aka Christina

Amalia X Perabody aka Janet

WinChel HedLou aka Penny Proctor

Tirmo Bresnel aka Christina

Geraldo French aka Rocky

E.T. Maryhart aka Delta Story

Astral Andy aka CyberMum

A. Aileen Quintorr aka CyberMum

Risian Staff photographer: Delta Story

Odra. T. Tar aka Cybermum, Julie, and Janet

advertisements

Stud in a Box: Christina and Jackee

Galaxigra: Delta Story


Truth and ConseQuences: Q takes Janeway on an incredible journey, where she has truly never gone before.